I feel that a lot of us see themselves as content in where we are. Professionally, financially, physically. But, then there comes along an opportunity to improve and we think, “Yes, here’s an opportunity to be more than content with my life. Here is an opportunity to grow”. I’ve had a couple of these moments myself. A couple of these opportunities were forced upon me. Such as the time that I moved to a new city and my first car got totaled because I was t-boned by this high teenager. I had insurance and with that insurance money I got my yoga certification. I saw this as turning a really negative event into a positive one. It made me feel clever about how I managed my life.
Then, when covid hit and we were all forced to quarantine, I was rather fortunate to receive a good portion of money from unemployment. I used those funds to help me get to Spain and settle my life here. Again, another time that I felt like I one-upped the universe and turned the odds to my favor.
After each of these negative occurrences had hit my life, I remember thinking that my world was over and wondering how I could possibly recover from such a devastating karmic defeat. But, then I would make a plan to use this time to accomplish one of my dreams. I’ve always wanted to delve deeper into yoga and get certified to teach it. I’ve always wanted to live in Europe and explore the world. Accomplishing these two rather large goals would not have been possible had it not been for the accompanying “tragedies”. It’s a rather cheesy conclusion to come to, but I’m happy that those rotten things happened because without them I wouldn’t be where I am today.
No, I’m not working my dream job. No, I don’t have a lot of money. But, I live in a beautiful city, with kind, funny roommates, and I wake up everyday content and happy with where I am.
Yes, getting this job would have changed my life and I would have more money and more of a handle on where my future is headed. But, it’s never been in my life’s style to just hand me things. I’ve always had to go through defeat to rise up and realize that I’m capable of so much more.
Yes, those two occurrences involved me receiving money, but maybe this time life is serving up a simple little problem, rather than a large tragedy to get me in the right direction. A rejection. I, like most people, do not take rejection well. But, I can either let it get to me and use the rest of the day to wallow and play the Sims. Or, I can write. Writers write. I tell people that I like to write and that I do. But, I really don’t do it that much. My writing has gotten choppy and sloppy. And that tends to happen to most muscles when they are not flexed and stretched. I am a writer. And I am going to write. Damn it.
So, here I am: a living, breathing energy conductor. Which, I get we all are, in a way. I need to transfer this negative energy into something positive and constructive. What can I make out of this? Yes, I want to visit this castle with my friend tomorrow, but maybe I should stay home and write. Maybe I should stay home and develop my website. I need to flex these muscles again. They’re here, they just need some work.
And I’m going to start working by writing a poorly written blog post. That will most likely be followed by another poorly written blog post. But, damn it, they will be blog posts that I publish on my website. And they will be me writing.
a Wilde Explorer 